Names removed to protect the hilarious

I’ve been cleaning out my email, and I came upon this gem from a friend sent a couple of years ago. Yes, I kept it that long, but trust me, it’s a keeper. Names have been withheld to protect the silly.

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So this morning I was standing in front of my mirror brushing my teeth and admiring myself. It was one of those mornings when you wake up and you just look good. My tight little tank top and yoga pants hung to my curves-I was lookin’ HOT. Extremely pleased with myself until I noticed that my foot that was propped on top of the toilet lid had some how become affixed to it. ( I now know it was left over nail glue that I had used earlier to take care of a two-step injury.)

Anyhow, here I am stuck to this damn toilet, suddenly realizing that I’m very late, way too far from a phone and the pad of my foot is becoming more and more stuck.

I laughed and pulled and hollered for a good ten minutes until finally the bottle of nail polish remover that I poured all over my foot/toilet finally started working and I was able to unfix my foot with only minimal skin loss.

Love you guys, miss you guys and most importantly glad that you still love me even when you know I’m a little bit of an idiot.

Now I ask you, how could you not love this girl? It’s impossible!

4 responses to “Names removed to protect the hilarious”

  1. Carrie Avatar

    That toenail never did grow back right. Thanks for reminding me what pre-pregnancy was like. I miss being stupid out of vanity not…pregnancy brain. What is pregnancy brain anyways?

    Love you too

  2. April Avatar

    Well if you’re gonna out yourself. I was trying to protect your reputation as a serious person and a force to be reckoned with. Now ya blew it!

    Pregnancy brain: when your tired and sick from a person growing inside you and more than a little existentially freaked that a person is growing inside you. It makes it hard to concentrate on things like where you put the keys or why you got in the car in the first place. You’re just extremely distracted.

  3. […] in related related news, my sister is really adorable, and I love her, despite her Facebook […]

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